Therapy for Polyamory & Consensual Non-Monogamy

Clients exploring or living in non-monogamous relationships deserve therapy that honors their unique needs.

Consensual non-monogamy (CNM) and polyamory offer powerful opportunities for connection, self-discovery, and growth. At the same time, they come with unique relational dynamics that benefit from skilled, affirming therapeutic support.

Whether you’re practicing relationship anarchy, open relationships, solo polyamory, or just beginning to explore non-monogamy, you deserve care that affirms your relationship values, without pathologizing or shaming your choices.

Therapy That Understands and Honors CNM

Despite cultural myths and outdated clinical assumptions, research consistently shows that non-monogamous relationships are just as psychologically healthy and fulfilling as monogamous ones. In fact, many people in CNM relationships report:

  • Equal or higher levels of trust, satisfaction, and commitment
  • Lower levels of jealousy and insecurity
  • More open communication about needs and desires
  • Safer sex practices and more frequent STI testing

(Citations: Conley et al., 2012, 2017; Rubel & Bogaert, 2015; Moors et al., 2017; Lehmiller, 2015; Ritchie & Barker, 2006)

In short, CNM is valid and can thrive.

Common Challenges in Polyamorous and CNM Relationships

While non-monogamy can be meaningful and expansive, it’s not without its challenges. Therapy offers a space to process and grow through experiences like:

  • Jealousy, insecurity, or comparison
  • Time, energy, or attention distribution issues
  • Misattunements or broken agreements
  • Coming out, or navigating stigma from family or culture
  • Feeling “stuck in the middle” within complex relational systems

Therapy can help you move from confusion or overwhelm toward clarity, confidence, and connection.

My Approach to CNM & Polyamory Therapy

I offer attachment-focused, trauma-informed, and non-pathologizing therapy for individuals, couples, and polycules in all forms of consensual non-monogamy, whether that’s dyads, triads, quads, constellations, or solo poly structures.

My work draws from:

  • Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) – to build emotional safety and strengthen secure bonds
  • Parts Work (IFS, Ego State Therapy) – to explore inner conflicts and promote self-trust
  • Attachment Theory – to help you understand your needs and communicate them with clarity

Together, we can:

  • Deepen emotional responsiveness and attunement
  • Explore jealousy with compassion and curiosity
  • Build secure connections while honoring autonomy
  • Clarify boundaries, agreements, and relational intentions

This space is curious, affirming, and attuned to the richness and complexity of CNM. You don’t have to defend your relationship model here.

What CNM-Affirming Therapy Is Not

Therapy can be a supportive place to explore consensual non-monogamy, whether you are already practicing it, considering opening a relationship, or trying to understand what kind of relationship structure feels most authentic to you.

At the same time, therapy is not a process for convincing a reluctant partner to participate, overriding someone’s limits, or guaranteeing that a relationship will successfully transition into non-monogamy.

Exploring CNM may involve slowing down and honestly considering questions such as:

  • Does each person genuinely want this, or is someone agreeing out of fear of losing the relationship?
  • Is the relationship stable enough to tolerate additional complexity, uncertainty, and change?
  • Are there existing ruptures, betrayals, or unmet needs that need attention before opening?
  • Are all partners willing to discuss expectations, agreements, sexual health, time, privacy, and the impact of new relationships?
  • Is there room for someone to say no, ask for more time, or discover that CNM is not right for them?
  • Are agreements being used to support consent and security, or to avoid necessary conversations and difficult feelings?

CNM can create meaningful, connected, and deeply fulfilling relationships. It can also reveal incompatibilities, attachment wounds, unequal power, or unresolved problems that were already present. Therapy cannot promise a particular outcome or preserve a relationship at any cost.

My practice is LGBTQIA+ affirming and kink- and sex-positive. I do my best to approach relational work without monolithic assumptions about gender, orientation, structure, or sexual expression. Together, we define the language that fits you and explore the underlying attachment patterns, emotional needs, and relational dynamics that impact your bond.

For Individuals Exploring CNM

You may be asking yourself:

  • Is non-monogamy right for me?
  • Can I unlearn what I was taught about love and commitment?
  • What do I truly need to feel safe and fulfilled in relationship?

I work with individuals who are:

  • Curious or questioning about CNM and need a safe space to explore
  • Unlearning internalized messages about love, sex, and exclusivity
  • Processing relational trauma (monogamous or otherwise)
  • Building confidence, differentiation, and self-trust

Whether you’re beginning this journey or reflecting after years of experience, therapy can support you in finding a relationship model that aligns with your values and needs.

Ready to Get Started?

Therapy can help you deepen emotional connection, navigate complexity, and move with more ease in your relationships whatever shape they take.

Schedule a free 15-minute introductory call to see if we’re a good fit. I’d be honored to support you both.

Frequently Asked Questions – Therapy Supporting Consensual Non-Monogamy

Yes. Completely. I have education and experience working with CNM clients and relationships, and I approach this work from a non-pathologizing, inclusive lens.

Yes. I can work with constellations of multiple partners, dyads, triads, quads, and more. We’ll collaboratively determine who should be in the room and what structure works best for your needs.

Absolutely. I am happy to work with those wanting to explore CNM as a possibility or to process past relationship experiences. You don’t need to be partnered or “decided” to benefit from therapy.

No. My role is to support your exploration and help you build relationships that are aligned, respectful, and nourishing, whatever form they take. I have no agenda that prioritizes monogamy for folks unless they express that that is what they choose.

Yes. Therapy can be a space to explore where you are in your relationship, whether you’re working toward reconnection, separation, or clarity. I’ll support you in exploring the decision that feels most aligned for each of you.

If there is current or ongoing violence, conjoint therapy is not recommended and may be unsafe. Therapy relies on emotional vulnerability and shared risk, which cannot happen safely when one partner is being harmed or controlled by the other.

If you’re in a relationship where abuse, threats, or physical harm are happening now, please know you are not alone, and support is available. A safer first step may be individual therapy or accessing community resources.

If there is a history of violence that is no longer ongoing, I may be able to support you, and we will carefully assess whether conjoint therapy is an appropriate and safe option.